Today is an emotional day for me. I met up with my friend that is dealing with a debilitating disease. I have known her for years and my life would not be where it is today without her. God put her in my life for so many reasons. Days like today I fight with my emotions and the biblical truth I know. The Bible tells me God is good. My life experiences tell me God is good. The lives of my sisters and brothers in Christ tell me God is good. Yet, days like today bring me to my knees fighting with my emotions so that God’s truth will prevail.
I believe we all think it or say it as some point in our lives. If you haven’t said or thought what I’m about to write down, please don’t judge the rest of us. Life can truly blind us and overtake us at times. I have thought, if God is good, why must my friend suffer so much? Years ago the legalistic me would’ve responded in less than a second with this answer, “God is teaching her something! God is disciplining her!” The real me, the godly me, now realizes God is teaching me something through her suffering.
I am learning to be thankful for so many things I have and she doesn’t. I can go for a walk anytime I want. I don’t have to acknowledge the pity in other people’s eyes because they don’t understand my physical limitations. I can come and go as I please. I rarely feel useless or like a burden to others. Don’t mistake my words, she is not useless and she could never be a burden, but those feelings overtake her at times or at least I gather they do. I also used to feel like that on a daily basis with out any debilitating disease. Until I met her.
Through her constant encouragement I was able to finally believe I was worth something, that I had plenty to offer. I’ve had my ups and downs over the years and she’s been there to see them all. At my worst point she reminded me that I had a purpose here on Earth. It didn’t matte if I wanted to go home and be with the Lord, it mattered He had work for me to do here.
She is one of the strongest people I know. I respect and admire her. I don’t see the disease that makes her suffer, I SEE HER. God is teaching me the most important thing about those in our lives that deal with disabilities or diseases that cause them is SEEING THEM. Not seeing their disease or disability, but seeing who they are as a person. Not for one minute have I stopped seeing her as the strong, refusing to quit woman she is. In fact, I see more clearly just how strong she is, just how determined she is and how amazing her story is.
God is good. Whatever my friend experiences, whatever I experience, God is good. God has a reason for everything and I don’t question that or His way of doing things. Sometimes I let my emotions try to override the truth, but as long as I go back to the Bible I cannot deny the truth. God loves my friend as much as He loves me and He is working in her life. Pray for her salvation.
Proverbs 3:5 Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. I cannot lean on my own thoughts, emotions or theories. I must lean on God’s word and trust God with all my heart. He knows what He’s doing. GOD IS GOOD.
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